Wedding Ideas

By: Tom Tsatsos

The wedding cake is one of the most important features of your reception. In fact, it is the centerpiece of your reception. You should begin shopping for a baker 6-8 months before the wedding. If you plan on having your reception catered, ask your caterer if they will bake your wedding cake. However, you do not have to choose the caterer to bake your cake. You can also buy cakes from commercial and boutique bakeries, custom wedding cake designer, a culinary school or someone you know who makes cakes from home.

Begin by calling bakeries or cake decorators in your area to check for date availability. If they are available, make an appointment to go in and check out the designs, taste and skill level of the business. Many specialty cake decorators require that you book six months to a year in advance to reserve your date, whereas commercial bakeries may require 3 months due to larger staff and their ability to do a larger quantity of cakes.

Since most weddings are on the weekends, baker’s deadlines also coincide with that timetable. A phone call to make an appointment to visit with the individual or bakery about your cake will be appreciated. If you just walk in and expect undivided attention, you may be disappointed if they do not have time to visit with you at that time.

Ask the baker to provide samples of the cake flavors, icings, fillings, etc., during your interview. The taste, flavor and texture of the cake itself will be the most important decision you will make when you order your cake. The outside beauty of your wedding cake will be important for your pictures and your personal statement, but the inside of the cake is what you will be serving to your guests. You want a cake that is flavorful, moist and good to eat.

Before your meeting with the baker, collect pictures of wedding cakes that appeal to you. Be sure to take those pictures with you on your interviews so that you can give your baker an illustrated idea of what you are looking for in a wedding cake. Here are some key questions you need to ask them:

Flexibility-Will they bake a cake according to your specifications?
Is the cake made from scratch or is it from a cake mix?
Request to see pictures of their work. Most bakers will have a portfolio of their cakes.
Certain cakes are not good for particular seasons. For example, if you are planning an outdoor wedding in August, you want to avoid cakes with mousse, meringue, whipped cream or buttercream filling. Ask the baker what cakes are in season.
What is the price per serving? Prices can average between $1.50 a slice to $15 a slice depending on the cake you choose. The price depends on frosting, decorations, architecture, etc. Understand that the more elaborate the cake, the more expensive the “per serving” price will be.
What are the extra charges? Most bakers charge for renting the pillars, columns, cake toppers, delivery and set-up. There may also be extra charges for certain cake fillings, flavors, styles, etc.
Who will be setting up the cake?
What do they provide in the set-up? Talk to your baker about how you’d like the cake table to be set up.
If you plan on using fresh flowers on your cake, who is responsible for providing the flowers, the baker or the florist?

When interviewing the baker, make sure you know the number of servings required, your desired type and design, and your budget for the cake. Be up front with the baker about the maximum amount you are willing to spend on your cake and ask them if they are willing to negotiate. Click here to see how you can save money on your wedding cake.

After you have decided on a baker and all the details, make sure to get everything in writing. Your contract should include the following:

• Detailed description of the cake type, style, and description of the decorations.
• The number of layers and fillings for each layer if applicable.
• Type of frosting.
• Wedding date, time and location of delivery
• When, how, where and by whom the cake will be delivered (or picked up). Make sure to include the complete address where the cake is to be delivered.
• Name and contact information of the baker
• List of rented items (pillars, cake stand, cake table, etc.)
• Delivery and set-up fees
• Total price
• Deposit amount
• Balance and due date
• Baker’s cancellation and/or refund policy

If you do your homework, buying your wedding cake will be a smooth process. Remember to be realistic, and don’t spend your entire wedding budget on your wedding cake.

By: Tom Tsatsos

The veil dates back to the ancient Greeks and Romans. They were wary of evil spirits and demons, and bright colors were believed to scare off these unwanted spirits. Occasionally, a Roman bride was completely covered in red veils to protect her from evil spirits. Others believe wearing the veil stems from the time of arranged marriages. The father of the bride may have feared the groom would not want to marry his daughter if he found her unpleasant to look upon, so the bride would be heavily veiled and she would not be revealed to the groom until after the ceremony.

Many believe the tradition of the ‘unveiling’ stems from Biblical story of Jacob and his two wives. Jacob’s father-in-law, Laban, tricked him into marrying Leah instead of his true love, Rachel. Leah was heavily veiled and Jacob did not realize he had married the wrong woman until after the ceremony. Thus the Jewish tradition of Bedeken was born, where the groom lowers the veil before the ceremony and raises it prior to the kiss.

The veil became popular in England during the 1800’s and signified modesty and chastity. In the Christian tradition, the veil is lowered by the father before the processional and is raised by the groom prior to the kiss.

In some Eastern ceremonies, the bride is veiled throughout the entire ceremony and is not unveiled until after it is over.

The wedding veil has evolved over the centuries, and has signified youth, virginity and modesty. Roman brides were married in swathes of brilliant red or yellow, while Viking queens wore metal skullcaps. Many Japanese brides still wear the traditional tsuno-kakushi, a white hood that supposedly hides the horns of jealousy. Veils made of lace were made popular in the United States by Nelly Curtis, the adopted daughter of George Washington. Legend has it that Major Lawrence Lewis, her father’s aid, saw Nelly standing behind a filmy lace curtain and he was so taken by her beauty that he asked for her hand in marriage. She then wore a lace veil on her wedding day in order to preserve the effect for her groom.

By: Tom Tsatsos

In ancient times, brides were thought to be particularly vulnerable to evil spirits, so in order to protect the bride, her friends were richly dressed in costumes similar to the bride’s and acted as decoys to confuse the evil spirits.

It was once common for the bride and groom, as well as their friends, to walk to the church on the morning of the wedding. Afraid that a spurned suitor would try to place a curse on the bride and groom, their friends would garb themselves similar to the bride and groom in order to trick the evil wishers.

Today, the function of the bridesmaid is to be a support to the bride as well as her confidant and friend.

Have you ever wondered about the purpose of groomsmen? Legend has it that this came about during ancient times when women were in short supply and a man had to literally kidnap his bride from her village, clan or tribe. The groom-to-be would bring along his ‘best men’ to help fight off angry family members or from competing suitors.

The best man of days-gone-by was responsible for more than the wedding ring. Since there remained a threat of the bride’s family attempting to forcibly gain her return, the best man stayed by the groom’s side throughout the marriage ceremony, protecting the bride and groom from any threats. He also served as a sentry outside the newlyweds’ home.

It is believed to bring good luck to the groom if the best man arranges for the groom to carry a good luck charm in his pocket on his wedding day. It is also considered good luck for the best man to pay the officiant’s fee in an odd sum.

Nowadays, the role of the groomsmen and best man has been confined to the honorary positions.

By: Terry L. Sumerlin

One Saturday, I left the shop a little early so that I could change clothes and make it across town in time to officiate a wedding. It was for a very sweet, young couple we know.

I was reminded of the time not long ago when Sherry and I celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary. Though we’ve only been married 35 years, wed heard so much about the 50th anniversary that we decided to go ahead and celebrate it in advance. We had one grand celebration. We went on a cruise and everything.

Having actually been married 35 years, and being recognized by the state as an officiant; I thought maybe I was qualified to give a little marital advice during the ceremony. I considered telling them that had they lived in the 1500’s they would have been about a month early for the wedding. Back then they took their annual baths in May and got married in June. Thus, the popularity of June weddings. I decided the bride and groom didn’t need to know that.

What I did tell them was about the young man who went to the father of his intended to ask for his daughter’s hand in marriage. The old gentleman fixed his eyes on his future son-in-law and asked, “Well, son, do you like her?”

“I love her,” he said.

The wise old fellow had a very direct reply. “I didn’t ask you if you love her. I asked you if you like her.” He explained the difference.

He explained, as I did during the ceremony, that falling in love is one thing. Being lifetime friends and companions is quite another. Falling in love is largely the result of physical attraction, and is natural. To stay in love we must learn to like each other. That can be a bit more of a challenge than attraction, because it requires an ongoing exercise of maturity. It doesnt just come naturally.

BARBER-OSOPHY: If a relationship lasts it’s usually because those involved have worked at liking each other.

Copyright 2004, Sumerlin Enterprises.

Terry L. Sumerlin, known as the Barber-osopher, is the author of “Barber-osophy,” is a columnist for the San Antonio Business Journal and speaks nationally as a humorist/motivational speaker.

Permission is granted for you to copy this article for distribution as long as the above copyright and contact information is included. Please reference or include a link to www.barber-osophy.com.

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